Friday, August 21, 2020
A Different Voice
A Different Voice weâre a strange bunch. the news articles ascribe to us an almost mythical legitimacyâ"weâre those kids. the ones that grow up to be new articles ourselves. but in between the late night pranks and the casually vulgar conversations and the stupid, stupid things we care aboutâ"weâre just kids. kids who start their own businesses at nineteen, twenty years old. kids who do research in government labs and kids that expect themselves to work for multinational companies by their sophomore summer. kids that build roller coasters in their backyard and computers in their spare time, in between doing homework and writing papers and trying to stay alive; sometimes we forget to eat, and sometimes we forget to sleep. weâre just kids. our jokes are a mix of violence and bathroom humor and we throw things out the window because we think itâs funny, and weâre still exploring our identities and our sexualities and our fashion sensibilities and making stone-cold mistakes about all of them. weâre still growing up. whenever i hear variations on the theme of âi was torn into a million pieces and then put back together againâ, itâs never about a school. itâs about a lover, or a religious experience, or something romantic like that. nothing as harsh, or as emotionally dry as âthe Instituteâ. but this placeâ"this place really does that to you. it wrecks you. it tears you down; makes you reevaluate your confidence and your dreams, and through that, you end up reevaluating yourself on a wide lens you didnât know you could look through. this place hurts. and then something goes right. and then you ace that test, you land that job, your project works and your research is published and you change your mind about yourself, again. success here is so hard to find and so gratifying when itâs finally grasped that it makes you feel as if youâre redefined every time you succeed, and thatâs what drives us for more. reality checkâ"at the moment, iâm 10 hours away from a 2.004 exam that i am so, so not prepared for that i really shouldnât be writing this. procrastination is like hard drugsâ"comforting, if only for the moment, after which it completely fs you over. and my procrastination takes the form of socializing, writing, and incessant online window shoppingâ¦i really, really need some knee socks. right? well, iâll figure it out. march on, march on. guest post by Piper (17) a new friend, and a close one.
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